pastor vs father

i cant believe myself. i am such a mean person. and an irritable one too.

i just lashed out at my mother for no reason. well, because the pots were filthy and i was actually getting used to my very clean kitchen the week she wasnt around and now ive got no clean pots to cook in. yes! the domestication! i hear thee!

and then my dad walked in with the motherload of sex and the city dvds sprawled all over my floor. i swore if those dvds had hands, they would be waving ever so frantically at my pastor father saying, lookie! lookie at me! i'm the devil! your daughter is watching SEX and the city. ooooohhhh... ahhhh....... i'm eeeeeeevil.....

man, i need my solitude away from my parents. i do. i had my earphones plugged in and a concerned pastor father standing behind me scruntinising it. i've never felt the term PG as real as it did just minutes ago. i was praying so hard that sex scene of samantha jones doesnt come up. and as noise-blocked those wonderful sennheiser earphones were, i could hear my dad passing some very pastorly, no, fatherly comments. i cannot decipher. the pastor or the father that annoyed me more. and it made me snap.

i yelled very irritably saying if they could show it on singapore tv, they could definitely show it in a preschool kindergarten. which i did know, wasnt true. but urgh! whats wrong with me. my dad just walked away sadly and asked if i still needed dinner. and all i could manage while stuffing my face with that other slice of cheese was a, "i'm not hungry." sigh, what is wrong with me.