40 days bapok

i just spent the past 3hours in the car with bapok below his blk chatting about almost everything and anything under the sun moon. well, then again, it was mostly about random girls and what nots, but still, nevertheless, it was time well spent. i could do that over and over.

he said something about how everything you do now affects your future. and its true! it just suddenly hit me that it aint all just about relationships and who you pick/break up with that matters now, but everything, literally everything you do now will create consequences that you'd have to bear in the future.

say your studies for example, if i dont buck up now, i really wouldnt know where i'd end up. and though i dont see myself confined to the 4walls of an office, i'd still somehow or rather have to work towards that. and though ive always rationaled thinking that the cert will only serve as your entry ticket for that longly awaited interview, that interview still acts as the starting line to your might-be career.

ah, lifes complicated. i wish we'd never have to grow up.

we talked about alot of things, about what we liked and didnt like. about frisbee, about the people around us, about being an alcoholic, and about not being an alcoholic. i wished for more times like these. where even hanging out in a car seems fun. id hope never to grow up to become someone who doesnt have the time for anything. id hope to never change. to wisen up and mature, yes, but to never mutate into a person i can no longer recognise. id pray hard. really i would.

i made a pact with him, that i'd restart my 40 days with him, for him to get a good job, and for me to seriously buck up. to study hard. to bring ben to church, to be good. it'll be interesting to see what comes out of this. haha, especially on bapoks end. im hoping that he miraculously survives the 40 days somehow or other. hah. though i honestly wouldnt see how it'll be possible if God doesnt somehow intervene. haha.