"lets break up serene"

i dont know whether it was just a mere accumulation of the events that took place today, or i was just being moody, perhaps a little pmsy, the tiniest things seemed to irritate the hell out of me today.

look at how the day even started. i woke at 10. and work starts at 830 mind you. washed up real quick and actually ran to catch the train today. everyone presume's i'd be late anyway, and it doesnt really make a difference whether or not i prove them wrong, so why bother. i didnt even inform Cathei i'd be late. haha. she called whilst on the train again today. and she was her sweet usual self. darn, im still not used to it. i should though, its beginning to happen a little too often.

i guess they dont really care about whether i come into work or not anymore. i mean, i really wanna make my last few days in the company worth the stay, but whether or not you give me the opportuniy to, thats a different story altogether.

i got into office happy. pleased and grinning slightly to myself that i like having the privilege of coming in late. i mean, not that the others dont. i guess the guilt of being responsible just doesnt hit me as hard. i honestly believe i thrive in a groundless, ruleless carefree environment. in the same way as how a flower withers when shoved and left in a dark closed up box. (of course, you cant count the bonsais, they werent supopsed to be like that) haha.

i was actually pretty hyper. and i managed to get quite a few things done today. even chased winnie for my quotes. i quite enjoy the seniority in my department as well, and yes, ive only been in there for half a year. i really cant imagine if i stayed on. i like having to know stuff that the new people dont. and that includes being the only decoder left to winnie's impossibly illegible handwriting. haha. i like ilikee....

but something just wasnt right. yes, i pranced to the biz dev. unit and did my morining hugs. but something was weird. like my entire world shifted. there he was, sitting right next to her. yes, the new designer dude. sitting next to my serene. and she was so into him. dilligently teaching him with utmost concentration. even if i intercomed her from jason's table this time, which is next to hers by the way, it probably wouldnt work now. she was fascinated by his cuteness, mesmerised by his innocence. urgh! shes mine u bugger, back off!

so we went on through the day, me being totally irritated by serene's new found love. and ben not caring less honestly didnt help, my lover and my own boyfriend totally nonchalant about whether i was alive or not. i didnt like that. something had to be done.

...fasttttt....

i called kio, and complained. heheehe....

i asked jason for my yacht viewing...hehehehehe....

and no, noot just to make you jealous. you had your new designer dude anyway. hmmph!

speaking of which, jason made excellent company today. its funny how it all started. i think we've had too many moments, its a little scary. not that anything will happen, but look at the things we do. similiar to what he pointed out today, its really true. vday, dinners and even watching the sunset from the vast open sea, slowly setting behind singapore's gorgeous skyline. (of course skylines are always gorgeous, and no, no pun intended. haha.)

just to note, the new marina south pier is really really pretty too. nice place to sit out and hang. haha. sorry, out of point. haha.

anyway...

i really enjoy our talks, our days out. its really an escapism from the reality of life. like what i told him yesterday. and it really does go way beyond mere romantic relationships. and i miss that. i miss being purely platonic knowing full well i'm safe acting the way i do without giving out the wrong signals. i like it when friendships attain that level. i guess its all a part of getting close. who knows, really.

i know im still irritated. and ben really isnt helping. but i know i'd pull through. coz theres only a minute left to the 25th. in which, i was supposed to spend at nings place. ahwell. theres always next year. i badly need my rest..